Indonesia Expat Magazine- Always A Rewarding Read!

Not paying much attention today, got a few bottles of Anker to drink out front on this magnificently hot arvo. Also have Indonesia Expat to read, picked up on my dawdle around town yesterday.

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• I took a brief nostalgic detour round Jaksa, a scene of dereliction, the Obama Bar seemingly defunct (or has it moved?) and Romance Cafe sinking into a ruinous state, a sad loss still, after four years or is it more?

I only went to Jaksa to exchange some books, but Ning’s little store was closed for the holiday.

So off to Ya Udah, quieter than usual, where a couple of reasonably priced  Bintangs accompanied me for the hour or so I spent there.

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 Ya Udah

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• That’s where I got the mag, and thoroughly enjoyed it.
• Good articles, in particular the one about the ‘cat weddings’ in East Java…   http://indonesiaexpat.biz/other/playing-for-rain/

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• ooooooooooooooooooo

• …but also burst out laughing at some of the ads.

There was one depicting some blonde bint hovering by a sink in a posh restroom, in a dress which was obviously designed for easy access to body-parts not allowed on our tv by the Indonesian censors.

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•  Jalan Falatehan
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• The said bog was way too fancy to be that more or less uni-sex facility in D’s Place on Jl. Falatehan, but she could do well there.

What was it advertising?

Posh taps!

Seriously! Who advertises taps?

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a tap’s a tap, for pity’s sake’

oooooooooooooooo

• Who shops for posh taps?

Presumably the guy who masquerades as the ‘Clandestine Critic.’

He actually writes amusingly of the joints he goes to, but although I had a chortle or two at his put-downs of the standard of service and the food, do he and I live in the same city?

His reported bill for two people was over a MILLION RUPIAH!

I pay about Rp.15000 for a very tasty and filling meal in my warteg.

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• Maybe if I wanted to impress some hoity-toity slapper encountered in the Mo Bar Ladies’ Night, I would stretch to Ya Udah, but c’mon, a HUNDRED dollars plus-plus to capture her heart?

In a city where many people get by on a monthly income less than he paid for his dinner?

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• YUK!

Having said that, his comments on fish and chips held my attention for seconds and seconds. Rp.140,000? That’s twice what I paid for PROPER fish n chips in Sydney.

He moans about how the pub concept ought to be tried seriously in snobby Kemang, but how about the chipper concept?

Real fish n chips is HARD to get here. 

Fish and Chips in Jakarta! A Veritable Grail-Quest! 

A lot of Indonesians think chips should appear (and taste) like fries, as Yanks call them.

If some guy or gal opened a REAL chipper – not in Kemang, please; it’s such an isolated kampung due to the terrible traffic – maybe in Blok M or Kota – it could be a gold-mine!

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And Indonesia has not been lumbered with the moronic hang-ups afflicting the UK, where it’s now forbidden by health nazis to wrap the food of the gods in old news-papers…

Like I say, Ankers away today…I’ll resume this tomorrow!

Beer-Battered Fish and Chips…in Jakarta?!?

Just got back from a meander round the bookstores in Jakarta’s Central Park mall,and have a nice paperback to read if the sun returns.

It began to rain as I left my fave warteg after a yummy lunch – one pound sterling for a big plate of tahu, tempe, cap cay and perkadel, and that included es teh and nasi putih, plus three fritters to take away for a snack later – so I’m happy to have made it home undrenched!

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• But that otherwise agreeable outing was not without health hazards – I almost had a heart attack going through the tunnel that takes you from the mall to the nearby side street, having passed a barber shop which advertised a simple hair-cut for RP.80,000 – that’s damn near EIGHT DOLLARS US. (at this point some over-paid expat NGO snob will blast off a salvo to my comments column saying how disgusting it is that I don’t waste money like him, and how can I POSSIBLY use the same eateries and services that ordinary Indonesians use!)

Shocking – where I go, in fact almost anywhere in Jakarta, the standard trim costs between 8K and 12K.

Were one to seek a more self-indulgent experience, a fine idea is to pop into one of the salons that sprout all over the place, staffed by aromatic wenches, who will do much the same job…

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 This is probably a year or two ago, but prices have not rocketed

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…and charge you Rp. 25 – 30,000, a price the paying of which is eased by the charm and warmth of the cutter. (Health warning -beware, some are operated by poofters!)

Some salon staff are even said to offer massages, for a little extra cash, but that is not a ubiquitous extra service – you need to suss out how friendly your salonette is before you ask!

 

And check she’s not a well-disguised trannie!

ooooooooooooooooooo

Anyway, from one delight to another.

Beer-battered fish and chips!

I left the mall via that tunnel and walked down to Tanjung Duren Barat Satu, my aim being to grab an angkot home…

 angkots

…via the warteg.

But what should I see when I reached that busy thoroughfare but a resto named Serassa, with a big sign outside advertising its various specialties.

One of which was the aforesaid BBFnC! 

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I didn’t eat there, because the dish costs Rp. 39,000, almost three times as much as I later paid in the place I like best (and that’s without the drink and probably the service ++)

But I’m tempted to try it on some special occasion.

Given the moronic regulation I posted on recently, the ban on mini-marts selling beer…

Bali Beer Ban Looms – Why Pander to Intolerance? 

…inaugurated by a millionaire minister just to make life awkward for us haram-addicted humans) it is reassuring that normal tastes are catered for here in Jakarta – you just have to know where to look!